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Insurance Claim Forms

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The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words. These instances of faulty writing serve to confirm that even incompetent writing may be highly entertaining.

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frown Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

frown The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.

frown I thought my window was down but I found out it was up when I put my head through it.

frown I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

frown A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.

frown A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

frown The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.

frown Pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.

frown In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

frown I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprange up, obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car.

frown I had been driving for 40 years when I feel asleep at the wheel and had an accident.

frown I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.

frown As I approached the intersection, a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.

frown To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

frown My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

frown An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

frown I told the police that I was not injured but on removing my hat, I found that I had a fractured skull.

frown I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.

frown The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run so I ran over him.

frown I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentlemen as he bounced off the hood of my car.

frown The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

frown I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.

frown The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way when it struck my front end.

the end

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